Sam. 21. Part-time fitblr, full time spoonie, recovered bulimic. Living with Crohn's disease, IBS, arthritis, and Hashimoto's Thyroiditis. I love horror movies, Gravity Falls, and Bob's Burgers. I like Orange is the New Black, Supernatural and New Girl. My fitblr goal is to get down the the weight I was before ED treatment without using self-harming techniques to lose weight. HW: 230 CW: 218 GW1: 185GW2: 165GW3: 145GW4: 135UGW: 130
Look lady I have crohns, I have yet to lose a bathroom stand off. Do you have blood coming out your ass? No? You can get the fuck out and let me poop in peace
Currently having a flare up and need to go on a clear liquid diet for a while.
However, I feel so hungry that I start eating solids. I try telling myself, ‘do it for the remission,’ but hunger overpowers that eventually. How can I stop this?
I have the hardest time with this
I want to see how many of us there are
I don’t like sports, but the Bearcats are my new favorite team.
I love how it gets more elaborate each time. These boys are thinking this through.
This is my favorite post of all time
Have any other spooners dealt with a feeling of loss of identity after being diagnosed? I’m not just talking about labeling yourself as ill or being a “sick person”. Just like when you look in the mirror you don’t recognize yourself?
Like I’ve gained a substantial amount of weight with my hashimotos to the point that I don’t recognize or like my body. But it’s not even that. When I look in the mirror or see myself in pictures it’s not me. Like I see myself and say “that’s not me, that’s not who I am”. I’ll point to a picture from 2 years ago and say “this is me! This is who I am!”
Like something is gone. Something is missing.
I used to glow and look happy and carefree and hopeful. Now I look like someone who is weighted down and sad and struggling. My smile has changed.
My therapist thinks that it’s because I am attempting to separate myself from my illness. But my illness is in my body so I’m separating myself from my body.
And it’s hard living with illness symptoms and it does change your body and take a toll on you mentally.
But I can’t describe the weird feeling of fear and detachment that comes along with not recognizing yourself.